The Last Month

I thought maybe I should finally post something, since it's been more than a month since my last post. Let's see, everything has been so crazy lately that it all kind of runs together...I have been dreaming about Tornados lately. Sounds funny, huh? Well I did a bit of research and here is what I found...
A Tornado is a violent storm in nature, and it may represent violent emotional storms in your dreams. Tornado dreams could represent the emotional changes in your life and also the amount of anger and rage that you may be currently experiencing. Tornadoes could also represent disruptions and upsets in you immediate environment and specific or current issues that may be overwhelming.
I know this is leaving a lot you in the dark as to what is going on in my life...It's like a season finale that just keeps you in suspense, I hate it when that happens. Honestly, I would rather not go into too much detail at this time, but just know that it's all good and everything will be all right.

Brooke, Scott & Carol

After dinner we decided to hit up a bar, The Beer & Wine Garden in Temecula. It's a pretty fun bar, they have a live band and after a few more drinks I was able to get Brooke and Carol out on the dance floor.

The Girls Weekend

Carol and I went to California this past weekend to help Brooke make her Wedding Invitations...Since we all scrapbook I thought it would be pretty easy. After we got started, I realized it was going to be harder than I thought. So, I kept volunteering for the easy jobs, no measuring for me. After the girls had a few glasses of wine and I had a couple beers it seemed to get a bit more difficult for all of us. We decided to finish in the morning...Scott was taking us out for dinner and more drinks:)

Macy

This is Brooke's baby, Macy...Isn't she just the cutest thing??? Nothing like my big moose for a dog. Titus and Macy have never met, I'm afraid that Titus would think she is a squeak toy :)

Mexico

We had such a great time in Mexico...This picture is of me & Kim on Friday evening. Can you tell we had way too much drink? The hangover on Saturday morning was pretty bad, but we did manage to go out on the boat on Saturday around 3:00pm to look for dolphins. Just before sunset the boat broke down and we had to be towed back, which took about an hour. We never did see any dolphins.

Mexico

As the day progressed we all found the beers were going down a bit too easy...Here we are at a local mini mart playing a dice game called "Left Right Center". It was a lot of fun, but I lost every time...Good thing I was playing with Derek's money and not my own :)

Trip to Rocky Point

Thank You to Brad & Kim for inviting us to come down to Rocky Point for the weekend. What a great time!!! This is a picture of their house in Cholla Bay, 4 bedrooms 3 bathrooms and it's on a hillside so the view is amazing, you can see Cholla Bay from the balcony. It's about a 5 hour drive to get down there, but it was well worth the drive. We left at about 9:00am on Friday and arrived just after 1:00pm. Once we were settled we cracked open a beer, went to lunch at "El Sombreros" and had the best carne asada tacos ever :)

Now I Really Have No Ass!

Workout & weight loss update!
I met with my trainer tonight to see how my diet and exercise are going...To see if I need to change anything that I am doing. We did my weight, I haven't lost any weight yet:(
And, as far as my measurements...I really did gain an inch in my boobies...Can you believe it? To make matters worse I lost 2 inches around my ass! Most women would think I am very lucky, but I already have big boobies...And anyone who knows me knows that I already have a flat ass so I really don't need to lose any weight there. My trainer said that I am probably one of the few women around who would actually be upset about this. What am I doing wrong???

Go Spartans

Brandon threw a Halloween Party...Derek and I decided to go as the SNL Cheerleaders...How cheesy, right? Everyone knows that I love a good "theme" party, but I was worried that I wouldn't have fun. I just haven't been in partying kind of mood lately. To have a beer every now and then is one thing. Needless to say I made up for any lost time or lost drinks. And what a good time :) Too good I'm afraid, I was praying to the porcelain gods when we got home...And oh the hang-over that I had. I don't drink like that too often, but when I do, there's no holding back :)

Diet & Workout Update

Amy made me weigh myself tonight when we got done working out :(
I have been trying to avoid the scale, hoping that when I eventually did check my weight I would have lost like 10lbs. But of course, not a damn pound...not even a pound!!! I feel like I am doing all this working out for nothing! I work 4 or 5 days a week and I watch what I eat (most of the time)...and I do it all for nothing. On a good note, Derek hasn't lost any weight either, but he looks like he has lost a little bit of his belly. He is just as frustrated as I am and talks about quitting, but I keep encouraging him and letting him know that I can see a difference. What a good suuportive girlfriend I am, I would make such a great wife :)

My Dress Dilemma

Okay...so I picked up my Bridesmaid dress over the weekend. I was so excited to get it. So, of course I had to try it on as soon as I got home. I wanted to take a couple of pictures to post to my blog...But I have a problem, I think that the 3 inches that I lost in my belly went to my boobs :) I could barely even get the damn dress zipped up! That would explain why I haven't lost any weight...it just shifted.

Dental Torture

Well, I survived the much-dreaded root canal this afternoon.

Did you know it is now referred to "Root Canal Therapy"...what is so therapeutic about getting a root canal??? I guess adding TORTURE to the name would scare everyone off. First they numbed me up real well, I made sure I the Endodontist was very aware of what a puss I am and I told him that I require extra shots. Surprisingly, the rest was bearable. I appreciated that he actually believed me when I said, "Yep, I can still feel that," and he shot me up even more...Previous Dentists have been pretty ignorant and say things like, "Well, that's impossible! You couldn't possibly still be feeling pain in that tooth!"

After less then an hour of minor torture I drove myself home...I think the worst part about my day was the fact that I didn't even get any good pain killers out it...Can you believe it? I bet he's never had "Root Canal Therapy" before...He told me to take Advil...Like that's actually gonna work :)

Brooke & Scott

Since I write about Brooke & Scott a lot and everyone will reading about all the details of their upcoming wedding, I figured it would be good for you to be able to put a face with name...I love this picture of them and they look so great together...They are so lucky to have each other!

Busy Weekend

Brooke and Scott were in AZ for the weekend to work on wedding plans. I never realized how much went into getting married and planning a wedding. We started at 8:00am on Friday, first we went to Bellasera, where the wedding will take place...It is beautiful. Then it was off to taste cake, meet w/ a DJ, taste more cake, then meet with a caterer. We finished up the day a little bit early so that was nice. On Saturday we started bright and early again, 8:30am...we tasted more cake, met with 2 photgraphers, a florist, and a couple more DJ's. Saturday night was definetly more relaxing, we hung out at Brooke's mom and dad's house, had some dinner and a few drinks. Even as busy as the weekend was it was still alot of fun.

Tired Boy!!

Titus and Kenny had a pretty busy day yesterday too with all of the people here. I don't think Kenny's tail or Titus's little nub stopped waggin' the whole afternoon. The dogs got a long great, which was a relief since in the past there had been a jealousy issue. After everyone clearned out Titus and Kenny were both asleep within minutes, only waking to eat dinner...then today, I was wondering were Titus was and found him a sleep in the back yard. I couldn't resist taking this picture...he is still so tuckered...poor baby!

Justin's 18th B-day!

Yesterday was Justin's 18th B-day...We had a nice little get together for family and friends. Derek grilled some hamburgers and hotdogs, overall I would say we had a pretty good turn out, from both Derek's side of the family and my side of the family. Justin got cards with money from everyone, and Derek tried to tell him that his 1st rent check was due, but he woudn't go for it. Of course the money was burnin' a hole in his pocket before the night was over and he wanted to go out to spend it. I have been sick since last Thursday and was still draggin' ass yesterday. I didn't take very many pictures and as you can see here the ones that I did take weren't very good.

Derek is still working on finding a car for Justin, nothing real expensive, but something that is reliable. Justin needs to stop ditching school first and pull his head out of his ass in order to deserve a car. On a positive note, since Justin is an adult now, if Derek or I need to smack him around or anything like that it will no longer be assult on a minor...Just Kidding :)

I Cheated...

The most important part of any workout plan or plan to lose weight is your diet. It makes up 80% of your success. Oops! On Saturday, Derek and I went to see 40 Year Old Virgin...I was so funny, what a great movie. Anyway, if you go to the movies you have to get popcorn, with lots of butter, isn't it like a law or something? Then I really didn't feel like cooking anything for dinner, and I hadn't had Mexican food in a while...We had Macayos take out, mini chimis and chip & salsa, and it was soooo good!!! Yesterday when my trainer saw my journal she was so mad at me...I tried to explain to her that I thought Salsa counts as a vegetable, but she didn't go for it. To make matters worse we checked my weight, I haven't lost a pound...And it's not because I am gaining muscle...My lean muscle mass has actually decreased. But on a good note I have lost 4 inches...3 of them around my waist. Needless to say, because I cheated on my diet, my trainer had me do the "I didn't stick to my meal plan" workout...OMG!!! I am so sore today!

#18 Update

Well, this is my fourth week at the gym...As of last Tuesday I hadn't lost weight. However, my pounds of body fat has decreased by 7 pounds. I absolutely love working with my trainer...She doesn't let me wimp out. Not only do I work out with her twice a week, and do at least 30 minutes of cardio 5-6 days a week, but we also came up with a meal plan, I have one issue with this, the amount of calories I am supposed to be eating. I like to munch on food throughout the day, and not necessarily junk food. Before I started working out I was lucky if I was eating 1000 calories a day. I wasn't doing this intentionally, but I get busy work, sometimes too busy to sit down and eat right. So now, I am supposed to be eating 1500-1700 calories a day...I feel like a cow, like I am full all of the time. I will have to do another weigh in next week, just to make sure that I am not gaining weight.

Dresses

I have had quite a few poeple ask me about Brooke's wedding dress and the dress that her Bride's Maids will be wearing...so here they are.



Okay, here is the dress that Brooke will be wearing for her big day...This picture doesn't even begin to do justice for how absolutely amazing she looks in it. As you can see in the picture the gown is beaded with metallic embroidery on the bodice and it has some on the train as well. The train is a long gorgeous chapel train.




And here is the dress that the Bride's Maids will be wearing. I can only hope that I will look this good in it. The good thing it has an empire waist, which hides my gut and as a bonus it makes my boobies look big.

Who -What - When - Where - Why - How - 39 Questions

I swiped this from Jen's blog -

1. What is your occupation?
Program Coordinator

2. What are you listening to right now?
Derek channel surfing and Titus's snoring

3. What was the last thing you ate?
Chicken taco salad...Yum!

4. Do you wish on stars?
Yep, all the time

5. If you were a crayon, what color would you be?
Purple

6. How is the weather right now?
Not too bad...the sun has gone down so it's probably only about 100 right now

7. Last person you spoke to on the phone?
Derek

8. Do you like the person who sent this to you?
I copied it from my cousin Jen's blog...and yes I love her

9. Favorite drink?
Diet Coke!

10. Favorite Sport(s) to watch?
Football

11. Have you ever dyed your hair?
YES! I am actually dying it now, I never go too drastic though

12. Do you wear contacts or glasses?
Yes, glasses but only when I am on the computer or when I am reading

13. Pets?
2 dogs...Kenny and Titus

14. Favorite Month?
I guess it would have to be December...I love from just before Thanksgiving to Christmas.

15. Favorite Food(s):
Mexican...Yum!!!!

16. Last movie you watched?
Monster-in-Law...it was pretty good!

17. Favorite day of the year?
Hello...August 9th

18. What was your favorite toy as a child?
barbies

19. Fall or Spring?
Fall

20. Hugs or kisses?
Depends...from who?

21. Cherry or blueberry?
I'll go with cherry

22. Do you want your friends to email you back?
yes!

23. Who is most likely to respond? ????
Not sure...I swiped it from Jen and mom and Mish never keep up on their Blogs!

24. Who is least likely to respond?
Mish or mom...as I said, they never write on their blogs!

25. When was the last time you cried?
Last week watching the devasation in LA & MS!

26. What is on the floor of your closet?
Shoes

27. Who is the friend you've had the longest?
Other than Mish & Jen I would have to say Tina...we met back in like 5th grade.

28. What did you do last night?
Went to bed early...I had a really bad headache...

29. What is your Favorite Smell?
fresh cut grass

30. What inspires you?
I would have to agree with Jen and say "the world around me"

31. What are you afraid of?
"Shoulda's" "coulda's" and "woulda's"...and spiders

32. Plain, cheese or spicy hamburger?
Cheese Burger...no tomatoes, mayo & mustard, lettuce, onion & heavy pickles

33. Favorite car?
Mazda 6...

34. Favorite dog breed?
Boxer...duh!

35. Number of keys on your key rings?
6

36. How many years at your current job?
2

37. How many states have you lived in?
3

38. How many cities have you lived in?
Are you kidding me??? I have no idea!

39. What is your all time favorite movie?
When Harry Met Sally

Maid of Honor

My best friend Brooke is getting married to the man of her dreams, Scott. I have known Brooke for about 7 years, we met while working at Discover Card. In March Scott was offered a great promotion at work...The only down side was that they had to move to California. But even now that they don't live here we are still as close as ever, probably even closer than we were before. Over July 4th weekend Scott proposed to Brooke! I was so excited for her that after we got off the phone I started crying. Since it looks like I may never be getting married I told Brooke that I was going to be living vicariously through her. I started searching the internet for a place for them get married, looking for wedding dresses, photographers, catering...Everything.

I was hoping that Brooke would ask me to be a bridesmaid...I would feel so priviledged...This past weekend Derek and I went to California to visit Brooke and Scott...Brooke asked me to be her Maid of Honor!

Working on #18

Mom, Dad and I joined the gym a week ago. I am working on #18 on my Things to Do Before I Die list...I met with my Personal Trainer for the first time on Thursday. I told her what my goals are as far weight loss, I don't really need to loose a lot of weight, but I need to firm up all over. When we were doing my measurements she told me that I have great legs and don't really need to work on them that much. I told her that I wanted to focus on loosing my gut since I have had it for as long as I can remember...So what does she do? She has me work my legs so much that I can barely move. It's Sunday and I am still in pain! I meet with her again on Tuesday...I really hope that we don't do any leg exercises...I don't know if I can handle it.

It's my B-day...I'm 29...again!

I don't feel 29, I don't look 29, I definitely don't act like I am 29...I am of the belief that age is a matter of feeling, not years. I don't think I have ever really acted my age. On a good note, Derek will be 38 this year...Hee Hee! I don't have any plans for my birthday, I think this is actually the first time since I turned 21 that I don't have anything planned. My God, maybe I am getting old!!!!! When I become President I will make it a law that you will not have to work on your b-day! It will be a paid day off. Not only am I stuck at work today, but I even had to dress up because we have guests coming in today :( Those who know me, know that I hate, I mean I really hate to have to dress up. I guess it could be worse I could actually be working instead of writing in my blog...

Is it really already August???

Where does the time go? I can't believe it's already August...Today is my parents 33 year anniversary. I hope that if/when I get married that I will be as happy as they are together. This morning I called to tell them happy anniversary, and of course dad is playing golf. I asked mom this morning if she was ready to trade dad in for a younger model, she said "Hell no, it took this long for me to train him..."

Nothing too exciting has been going on, but here is a quick update.

I am happy to say that I have not had any anxiety attacks in a while, I love my therapist, she is wonderful. Derek decided to join a gym this week...he wants to get in shape. So of course I have started to really work out, God forbid he should ever look better than I do, I've lost more than 10 lbs. Mom and I are going to join a gym together, this way we can be each others motivation. Cheyanna's dance recital was last weekend, she did a great job, I can't believe she starts kindergarten this year. Brianna on the other hand is a Freshman in H.S. this year.

Work sucks! Two of the girls that I have become really good friends with have left the company. They are both teachers and were offered more money from another school. I don't thing money is the reason they left...I think it is all the drama, I have been trying to steer clear of it, but in such a small company it's hard to do. As much as I like what I do, I have been considering finding a new job. I have realized that I could get paid so much more for the work that I do, so for me it is a money issue.

Well, that's it for now...Like I said nothing too exciting.

Things to do before I die

I got the inspiration to make this list from Jen...These are some of the things that I would like to do before I die, in no particular order. The sad thing is that I haven't done any of the things on my list yet! Now that I think about it, maybe my last 2 should be a priority, I'm not getting any younger!

1. Attend at least one major sporting event: Super Bowl, Olympics, U.S. Open
2. Throw a huge party and invite every one of my friends
3. Swim with dolphins
4. Learn to speak a foreign language
5. Spend a whole day eating junk food without feeling guilty
6. Be an extra in a film
7. Learn not to say yes when I really mean no
8. Learn to ballroom dance
9. Write the novel
10. Ask for a raise
11. Learn to play a musical instrument
12. Get passionate about a cause & spend time helping it
13. Take a road trip across America
14. Sleep under the stars
15. Visit New Orleans during Mardi Gras
16. Learn to juggle with three balls
17. Go white water rafting
18. Spend three months getting my body into optimum shape
19. Accept myself for who I am
20. See Statue of Liberty, in person
21. Catch a ball in the stands of a major league baseball stadium.
22. Take a trip to Washington D.C.
23. Learn to bartend & become a Coyote (Like on Coyote Ugly)
24. Ride along with storm chasers
25. Sit on a jury
26. Travel to Italy
27. Spend the weekend at a spa and get “Star” quality treatment
28. Visit New York City at Christmas Time
29. Take a Caribbean Cruise
30. Become debt free
31. Fly anywhere first class
32. Meet someone famous
33. Go on an African Safari
34. Go whale watching
35. Get a College Degree
36. Get married…

Titus

Yesterday I was a dog.
Today I'm a dog.
Tomorrow I'll probably still be a dog.
Sigh! There's so little hope for advancement.

Fire in AZ

Fire in AZ

The fire fighters were on the ground making sure that the fire didn't threaten any structures and they were putting out the areas that they could reach. The fire eventually burned itself out...

Fire in AZ

More importantly, the 500 Club, one of the Golf Courses that Dad plays, is just East of the park. The Helicopter, that was dropping water, was filing his Bambi bucket at one of the water hazards on the golf course.

Fire in AZ

On Sunday, July 3rd, a large brush fire start at Thunderbird Park, which is less than a mile away from our house. Here are some of the pictures that I took.

Thunderbird Park, an 1,185-acre park in the Hedgpeth Hills. Hedgpeth Hills is Glendale's only mountain preserve. There are about 20 miles of hiking trails on either side of the road.

Bri & Me

Another weekend come and gone...they are never long enough. I spent Saturday in the pool at mom's house. It was me, mom, Brianna and Cheyanna, dad joined us after he finished playin golf...it was a nice day. After we got out of the pool I realized I got a bit too much sun, I got a bit sun-burned. Brianna decided it would be cute to do my hair. Cheyanna, who is 5 yrs old, thought it was the cutest hair style ever. At first I thought it would be okay, I like it when people play w/ my hair, it relaxes me...how bad could it be right? Boy was I wrong, I think my eyes are still a little bit slanted after two days, she pulled so tight...Ouch!

Let's go Pistons!!!

I have always liked sports, and during football season you can't get me away from the TV, but I am not a huge fan of basketball, I think the game has changed so much in the last 10 years...But ever since Mish was out here I have watched every game the Pistons have been in. Justin says that I am like a guy watching the games, yelling at the TV, "Where's the foul?", "Come on, traveling...How many steps is Ginobli gonna take", hoping Duncan will choke at the foul line. I had hoped that it would have been the Suns & Pistons in the Finals, maybe next year. Don't get me wrong though, just because I live in Phoenix, doesn't mean that I would have been rooting for the Suns, I am a Michigan girl, a Detroit Fan no matter what sport and I always will be. I read an article this morning that said the Pistons, in their past 10 games with a chance to eliminate an opponent, are 10-0...LET"S GO PISTONS!!! Don't call me after 6:00, I will be busy!

My Slump...

I have always had this obsession about my weight. I guess it’s because I used to be fat…I swear I will never look like that again. And what you see on TV doesn’t help…the media portrays the message that happiness and success come in this thin little body. I don’t want to be too thin, just loose the 20 lbs that I have put on since last October and get back into my size 6’s. Okay, now mom, when you read this, don’t freak out! It’s really hard to get motivated right now. I feel like I am in this slump, I’m not happy. I feel gloomy, like I am tired all the time, I could sleep all day. Maybe I am going through a mild depression. I know that one of the major side effects for Lexapro, the anxiety medication that I take, is tiredness. Another major side affect is weight gain, but that comes with just about any anti-anxiety med that you take…maybe I should think about switching meds. There are other side effects from my meds that I have notice too, but nothing so severe that have made me want to switch. For now I am going to start taking my Lexapro at night to see if that helps with the tiredness at all, and I have scheduled an appt to see my doctor, did I mention how cute he is?

It's Gettin' Hot...

Today it is supposed to get up to 108ْ
But it’s a dry heat…First let me say that regardless of how dry it is anything over 105 is hot! On average we have about 90 days of 100ْ or higher, the hottest day ever recorded was on June 26th 1990, it was 122ْ …Thank God we didn't get to AZ until July 4th 1990!

You know you're in Arizona when ...
*You no longer associate bridges (or rivers) with water.
*You can say 110 degrees without fainting.
*You eat hot chilies to cool your mouth off.
*You can make instant sun tea.
*You learn that a seat belt makes a pretty good branding iron.
*The temperature drops below 95, you feel a bit chilly.
*You discover that in July, it takes only 2 fingers to drive your car.
*Sunscreen is sold year round, kept right at the checkout counter.
*You put on fresh sunscreen just to go check the mail box.
*You discover that you can get a sunburn through your car window.
*You notice the best parking place is determined by shade instead of distance.
*Hot water now comes out of both taps.
*It's noon in July, kids are on summer vacation, and not one person is out on the streets.
*You actually burn your hand opening the car door.
*No one would dream of putting vinyl upholstery in a car or not having air conditioning.
*You know better than to get into a car with leather seats if you're wearing shorts.
*You notice your car overheating before you drive it.
*You think someone driving wearing oven mitts is clever.
*You know a swamp cooler is not a happy hour drink.
*You can say "Hohokam" and people don't think you're laughing funny
*You can pronounce"Saguaro", "Tempe", "San Xavier", "Canyon de Chelly", "Mogollon Rim", and "Cholla"
*You hear people say "but it's a DRY heat!"
*You buy salsa by the gallon.
*You think a red light is merely a suggestion.
*Most of the restaurants in town have the first name "El" or "Los."
*You think 60 tons of crushed red rock makes a beautiful yard.
*Vehicles with open windows have the right-of-way in the summer.
*Your biggest bicycle wreck fear is, "What if I get knocked out and end up lying on the pavement and cook to death?"

Learning to Ice Skate

Just because we live in Arizona and it's 100' outside doesn't mean we can't ice skate. This was Cheyanna's first time on ice skates. Poor Cheyanna, Amy and I were laughing about it, but we don't remember it being this hard. Growing up in Michigan everyone knew how to ice skate. My brothers taught me. They decided they needed a goalie...so the strapped some skates on me, pushed me out on the ice, and said...now skate.

Learning to Ice Skate

It took Cheyanna a little while, but she finally got up the courage to let go of the side rail and her Mom and Aunt Kristen and was doing pretty good by herself. I had to keep reminding Amy that she would be okay if she fell. She only fell a few times, more than anything she didn't like the coldness of the ice on her hands. We had a good time and decided that we should go more often. What a way to beat the heat...

Dog Bite

We have had Kenny for about 9 years and Titus is just over 2 years old. I was dog sitting for Derek's Nephew, he has a golden lab puppy named Norm. Norm and Titus love to play together. Suddenly Kenny and Titus began having territorial issues. They got into a couple of pretty bad fights, Titus got bit just above his eye, it was bleeding pretty bad, and of course I completely freaked out. After Norm went home I thought everything was okay, like maybe it was a jealousy thing, but apparently not. They got into another fight and wouldn't stop. Instead of grabbing the hose that was just a couple of feet away from me I tried to break it up...What in world was I thinking?? Trust me, I have heard from everyone about what a dipshit I was for sticking my hand in there. Typically dog bites do not get stitched, but my bites were pretty deep and I had to have 3 whole stitches.

We have put our dogs in obedience training and go to group classes on Saturdays. They are doing much better, but we are not able to leave them alone together. Our trainer says that Kenny is the one who is posturing, aka throwing gang signs, at other dogs. He wants to be the alpha dog.

I live w/ all males, you'd think they'd have it figured out by now that I am the Alpha!!!

A Little Anxiety Anyone?

Everyone experiences some for of stress, anxiety, fear. For me anxiety has created havoc. Anxiety is the most common "disorder". There are 7 major categories of anxiety disorders: Generalized Anxiety Disorder, Social Phobia, Panic Disorder, Agoraphobia, Specific Phobia, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, and Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder. It has been estimated that more then 25,000,000 Americans suffer from anxiety…thank god I am not the only crazy one! Knowing that I am not alone and am not the only person who suffers from anxiety/panic attacks has helped me to cope with them. Being able to talk to friends and family has helped me a great deal.

I suffer from Panic Disorder, meaning I have panic attacks. A panic attack is a period of paralyzing intense fear...If you have never had a panic attack I would not recommend it, nor would I wish it on my worst enemy. The attacks can last anywhere from a minute to 10 minutes and during this time, I am sure that I will die. Here is some of what I experience while having a panic attack: Irregular, rapid or pounding heartbeat, Severe perspiration, A sense of choking, suffocation, or shortness of breath, Light-headedness, Feeling a sense of detachment from myself, Hot/Cold flashes, Fear that I will die, Nausea or upset stomach, Jitteriness and trembling, Thoughts of going insane or completely losing control, and I have fainted on more than one occasion.

Different things trigger my attacks. I avoid long lines, and I do not do well in crowds. I don’t like to drive in a lot of traffic, and I avoid driving on certain freeways.

Because I have fainted due to my panic attacks I find that I worry when the next one will come. Will happen when I am alone at the Mall, at work, or while I am driving? I am currently taking medication for this and have not suffered from a full blown panic attack in months.

Me & Titus

This is me and my baby...Titus. When my boyfriend, Derek, and I had talked about getting a dog, I said I wanted a lap dog. Derek insisted on getting a boxer. Titus is 2 years old and he is my baby. Even though he weighs 70 lbs. he still tried to be my lap dog.